A professor was recently lamenting the sartorial sins of his fellows, in a pompus article about how educators should dress better.
Leaving aside the wisdom of such a proposal, the following leapt out at me:
Here's a draft Uniform Uniform Code:Faculty members shall, when on college grounds or on college business, dress in a way that would not embarrass their mothers, unless their mothers are under age 50 and are therefore likely to be immune to embarrassment from scruffy dressing, in which case faculty members shall dress in a way that would not embarrass my mother.
That's it. Brevity works.
"Brevity works" he says, after using sixty-five words to elucidate a rule that could be expressed as "Faculty members shall dress in a way that would not embarrass my mother." If you're feeling charitable, you could add "...when on college business." Of course, his rule is more flexible - if your Mom is 51 and thinks teaching in a thong is OK, you've got a free pass! But, somehow, I don't think that was his intent. His solution is wordy and doesn't get the result he wants!